Boston has a missing ice cream cone with a name, a possible dorm-window sighting, and a reward payable in baked goods. Swirly, the plastic mascot of Flour Bakery on Boston Common, has become the subject of a very sweet appeal: please bring him home.
According to UPI’s May 5 report, co-owner Joanne Chang initially thought the decoration had blown away. A possible sighting in a nearby dorm window raised hopes. Her public offer was baked goods and gratitude for its return, with no questions asked.
This is a negotiation strategy with considerable charm. Most missing-property notices give you a number to call. This one introduces the possibility of pastry.
A Clue in a Window
The Boston Globe identified Emerson’s Little Building as the possible location. The cone’s identity remained unconfirmed.
That leaves plenty of room for a good story, without identifying a culprit. A photograph can prompt a hopeful walk across the street; it cannot tell us who moved an object, why it moved, or whether somebody deliberately took it.
Swirly is nevertheless perfectly cast as a tiny missing celebrity. Give an everyday object a name and suddenly a window becomes a lookout post. A decoration has whereabouts. A retrieval becomes a homecoming. Somewhere in the imaginary newsroom, a reporter has been assigned the dessert beat.
The Reward Is the Best Part
The charm of the appeal is its easy exit: return the thing, let everyone move on, enjoy something delicious. It offers the holder a graceful way to end the mystery. There is no need for the public to turn a bakery decoration into a detective game about individual students.
And a replacement would feel different, even if it looked identical. Once an object has become a character in a story, buying another one does not quite resolve the plot. You would not replace the last page of a novel with a receipt.
We have a similar soft spot for Sheila, the three-wheeled car taken from London to Cape Town. The name helps an object carry a whole adventure. In Swirly’s case, the adventure appears to require rather less fuel.
Even the Replacement Has a Proposal
On May 7, PETA announced a conditional offer: it would provide a replacement mascot if Flour added vegan soft serve at all its locations. That was an offer from PETA, rather than an announced agreement with the bakery.
A missing cone acquiring a proposed menu policy is a remarkably busy week for an object that cannot walk. Somewhere between the window clue and the replacement negotiations, Swirly has developed a more complicated public life than most outdoor signage ever expects.
The Pudgy Cat Verdict
Bring the cone home, if you have him. Let the reward remain the uncomplicated part of this story.
There is something lovely about a little neighborhood object becoming worth an appeal. It suggests that people notice the small things on their regular routes, and would like them back when they disappear. A familiar face need not have a pulse. Sometimes it can advertise soft serve.
Our preferred ending involves a reunion, a railing, and a bakery getting back to baking. Until then, the case remains open, and the imaginary detective is making a very persuasive argument for an expense account at Flour.
